Born only to suffer, miseries, miseries and miseries only

A strange but a true story of a person who was born to suffer throughout her life. The story is of one of my grandmothers who lived very near to us in the main big family house. I was very closely associated with her.

Shri Jagan Nath was the second to youngest brother among five brothers of my grandfather . He died very young, even before I was born and after his death, his family met a very tragic end. I was told that he was not smart and very active person with no means of earning.  He was not very capable or able person to do any thing meaningful in life. He was perhaps the poorest of all his brothers, in all respects. His family gave him responsibility of attending social obligations on behalf of the family ( such as attending wedding ceremonies, other functions in the community, and funerals etc).

My grandmother was born in another nearby town, Tajpur- a famous Riyast in our region. They were two sisters with entirely different fate/destiny to live their lives.

She was married to my grandfather while the other sister was married into a very rich and prosperous family in Bijnor. Shri Ajit Prasad was the top most lawyer of those days in Bijnor . There is no comparison in the lives of the two sisters. One enjoyed the best of the world while the other suffered through out her life with all kinds of miseries and pain.

They had two sons, Krishan Kumar and Om Prakash (commonly known as OMI); all their uncles, especially one of my grandfathers, Shri  Bihari Laj ji  ( who retired as Executive Engineer, and settled down nicely in Delhi) tried to improve them and to EDUCATE them but of no avail.  They had very poor IQ and EQ. They did not do any thing in their lives except loafing around and living on the little income they had from their property and support from the family members(our family  was very strongly bound, collective and united family, impossible now to imagine that kind of cooperation and feelings for each other in the family); They lived  in extreme poverty and very miserable conditions. They had very little intelligence, common sense or understanding otherwise. All of them in that  family came together having very poor destiny. My grandmother had, perhaps the worst kind of fate, never saw any thing good in her life, very pathetic. I never saw her wearing a nice dress, eating good food etc. She struggled through out her life with poverty, starvation and all kinds of miseries.

After having two sons , she became widowed at a very young age. She had to bear the responsibility of bring up her two sons alone. They tortured her through out her life at every stage as they were born with a specific purpose to trouble her and make her life difficult and miserable. She lived in the other house of the family though used to come to our house on a daily basis for something or the other. She was comfortable only with our family. She was never free from problems and troubles. She was very nice person by her nature, very loving, affectionate and soft spoken person.  Though surrounded with all kinds of problems, I never saw her angry or disappointed. I had special consideration and great sympathy for her. I always had a desire in my heart to help her in any way. I always visited her and asked for her welfare. Her sons used to beat her to extract at even the smallest thing she had and used to ask her to come us and ask for money etc.My own family helped her in all possible way, all the time.

I never saw her praying or worshipping, going to temple etc. as, perhaps she had lost her faith in God. I never saw her visiting any other person or family except our family. Almost socially isolated.

Years passed, her sons though now grown up and adults , but never came to age even to help themselves. Always bothering their mother for their needs.

Her younger sister in Bijnor who was very rich and prosperous visited  her very often and wanted to help her every possible way. But according to the social system an elder sister will never take any help from her younger sister, hence my grandmother never took any help from her. She tried to help her sons in all possible ways but of no use and it was somewhat never ending.

The last part of her life is really pathetic and worth mentioning here. Baba Har Prasad ji, once came from Muzaffarnagar and scolded Dadi ji that she is the only one who has given her sons undue shelter and support and spoilt them. Let her come with him to live in Muzaffarnagar  leaving them alone behind on their fate. This way they will learn their lesson and will do something to live with out depending on her. Fed up with her situation and every day trouble from her sons, she decided to go with him to Muzaffarnagar for some time After she left they started doing some thing here and there as no options left for them., Krishna Kumar  was working in a watermelon farm as watchman , was caught by LOO ( very hot and dry air during the month of May, causing dehydration and many other ailments to the population) and ultimately by severe Cholera suffered a terminating situation and died in a very short time, all of a sudden. Due to poor transportation and medical facilities in the town, he could not be given adequate and proper treatment. Perhaps, he could have been saved if timely help was available for him to take him to District Hospital in Bijnor.(Perhaps, he was not alone, as in those days, how many would have died in the town with out proper or adequate medical facilities?). Dadi ji was called back immediately after his death from Muzaffarnagar, and for what? Just to mourn her elder son. She was terribly shocked and saddened and was broken down from this event. She was very much unhappy, angry, frustrated and disappointed with everyone in the family. She had no option except to accept the fact of the life. She became very quiet and silent after she lost her elder son.

My grandfather, assessing the situation, thought perhaps the marriage of the younger one may bring some relief to her and a difference in her life. He  arranged the marriage of Om Prakash, the younger one with a  girl from a village in Garhwal . Our family arranged this marriage(rather bought that girl for Rupees 5000/-, which was very common practice in those days for the rich people). Anandi Chachi was one of the most beautiful women in our family. She was quite young and certainly no match for Om Prakash who later never cared for her, never treated her as his wife, had no love, attraction or association at all with her. It was his incapability to give any importance to any relationship , not only to his wife. However, it gave some consolation to Dadi ji in her grieved situation. She got busy in looking after her with some hope for the future. The burden of expenses, directly and indirectly came to my grandfather.

Time passed and Dadi was blessed with a grandson, very handsome boy . She forgot all the previous sufferings and got busy looking after  the child. She was very happy, satisfied and contended with this changed situation. I used to go very often to meet Dadi ji as I had great sympathy with her and she was also very affectionate to me. She was very glad whenever I visited her. Once, she asked me that I must take care of this boy and develop him. I promised her to do so and she had a trust in me. I also decided that I will do my best to bring up the boy . After a few years, when the boy was about five years old, he got very severe attack of smallpox and died with its complications(again a case of poor medical care and facilities at home and in the town). Dadi was completely shattered and completely exhausted with the calamities and miseries of life; tolerated the loss of her husband at her young age; tolerated the death of her adult and fully grown son and now the last hope of the beloved grandson is also gone. After the death of her son, frustrated and ill treated by her husband, Chachi ji went back her home in the hills not to come back again. Dadi ji was left alone to bear all the sorrows and loneliness. She died soon after that. No one cared for her son Omi after her death.  He wandered here and there and survived perhaps a few years with bare minimum resources and died in mysterious circumstances. The government did all the last rites. During his last years of life for his survival, he sold out whatever property was left after the death of his mother ( a small house, some shops etc.) .

This is the end of the family, their property, and everything . I do not understand as why God punished Dadi ji and that family so much that they never saw any thing good in their life except the troubles, miseries and sorrows all the time. VERY TRAGIC END. I do not understand the purpose of their coming to this world and their existence.


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